Because Our Stories Are More Powerful Than Our Shame

 

What is your story?

 

We all have one. You know, the story that contains the good, the bad, the ugly of our journey that has led us to today. The story that pressed in on us, that chipped away at us, that left us a little more bruised and a little less brave to step into our future.

 

Somehow we didn’t ask for this story. We didn’t ask for the pain of rejection, the bitter war-wounds that etched themselves deep…so deep we can trace the edges of our scars and still feel a twinge of heartache rise from our belly and press down hard on our heart.

 

How do you tell your story?

 

For most of us, me included, our story is riddled with shadows and cobwebs, dusty, hopeless corners that when stepped into, trigger a mountain of shame. Soul shame.

 

I don’t like my shame story. It held me prisoner for far too long. It led me to the darkest battlefields of self-hatred and locked me in its cycle of fear, of longing, of desperation to find my enough-ness.

 

The truth is, I never felt enough. Never felt good-enough. Never felt strong-enough. Surely never felt capable-enough, brave-enough, or worthy-enough.

 

Shame never yields the fruit of worth we long for. Shame always steals from us our “enough-ness.” It saps hope dry.

 

Though God’s quiet voice whispered His great love towards me, it was easier to hear the voice from the enemy that groaned my judgment and condemnation, easier to believe my lack, to claim my scarcity.

 

Yet shame doesn’t have to have the final word for any of us…

 

Begin to own your story, the whole story.

 

Don’t edit out the parts and pieces that reveal your pain. Don’t leave blank pages, hallow pages. When everything in you wants to run from your past, stop. Healing never comes when we’re running away from anything.

 

Claim it all. Speak it all. All. That means every moment, every measure, every single encounter that has tried to control you and trap you in its web of shame.

 

We can live with the pain of brokenness… what can slay us is the shame of brokenness. _Ann Voskamp

 

 

God’s love is big enough to hold it all. Powerful enough to heal it all. We can only experience healing and wholeness when we can welcome home all that has created us, molded us, crushed us, and bruised us so that we can be healed.

 

We can only experience healing and wholeness when we can welcome home all that has created us, molded us, crushed us, and bruised us so that we can be healed.Click To Tweet

 

Invite God Into Your Story.

 

When we invite Him into the most tender, aching wounds that feel as dead as a tomb on a hillside outside Jerusalem, He sweeps by in the still of night and in an instant, breathes new life, new healing, new hope for what could be and is coming to be in our own resurrection story.

 

While so much of our story feels irrefutable and irreversible, God shows up redeems the most pitiful, most pain-filled past. Invite Him in. Let Him hold you while you heal.

 

Psalms 147:3 (NIV) tells us, He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

 

Rewrite Your Story With Compassion.

 

Shame and compassion cannot coexist.

 

Our wounds are like frightened children just trying to find their way, desperate to survive for one more day. In all the hurt and tearful places, instead of hiding them or shaming them, speak love over them. Be gracious to the weaker, fragile parts of your soul. Do not judge them. Be tender with them as they heal, as they grow.

 

Compassion given always comes back to nurture us and heal us.

 

Compassion given always comes back to nurture us and heal us.Click To Tweet

 

Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light._Brené Brown

 

We are all writing the story of our healing. Our transformation. The bravest souls who rewrite their story discover in the end that it was not their shame that defined them, but their courage to heal and to grow and to become all God created them to be.

 

For every soul searching for healing, for compassion, for hope in the middle of their story.

 

And as His presence greets me with the first breath of each new morning, I ask myself…

 

Today, what will be my story?

 

About This Community

Don’t we all want a little peace?  My heart for this community is to provide just that – a needed refuge from all the burdens that weigh us down, some encouragement and inspiration to keep us weary travelers moving forward on our journeys, and some practical advice to help each of us navigate the challenges of life and relationships.  Whether in our parenting, our marriages, our faith, or the broken places in our hearts, this place is for anyone who dares to reach beyond the hopelessness that surrounds us and embrace a lifestyle of emotional abundance and peace!  


About Peace for a Lifetime

In my new book, Peace for a Lifetime, I share the keys to cultivating a life that’s deeply rooted, overflowing, and abundant, the fruit of which is peace. Through personal and professional experience as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I’ve discovered how to take the broken pieces of life and find indestructible peace with myself, God and with others. Through my story and other’s stories you’ll realize that you can experience the life for which you long. You can experience abundance beyond anything you can imagine. You can experience peace, not just for today, not just for tomorrow. You can experience peace —for a lifetime!

Peace for a Lifetime is available on Amazon.com.

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16 Comments

  1. Rebecca Jones

    March 6, 2018 at 3:26 PM

    Such beautiful words about healing and letting go of shame.

  2. I love this encouragement to share our stories. For many of us, it’s hard work to look into those shame-filled corners. I’m one of those people! Thanks for passing along grace so we can do the same for others.

  3. Beautiful words and our stories are beautiful because they are all His stories.

  4. Lisa, YES!
    We can’t control our past, but we can take the hand of God and look at it through a lens of love and forgiveness, healing and grace.
    Blessings to you and thanks for your heart of compassion.

  5. Absolute truth, Lisa. Our story is more powerful than our shame. Let’s start a 2 Corinthians 1.3-4 movement!

  6. Telling our stories is so valuable and healing to us and those around us. God takes our stories and uses them to help others. To declare his goodness. Great post.

  7. Lisa, this is such an encouraging and hope-filled post. It is so true. When thinking back on the stories of others, it isn’t the shame that is my focus but their courage and the mercy of God in their lives. May we tell our stories so that God would use them to help those around us. Wonderful post!

  8. My husband has always been comfortable telling “our story” (much of ours is intertwined), but I was uncomfortable with it for a long time. Thankfully, I’ve learned to embrace it for the most part, but there are still those dusty corners that stretch me to talk about.

  9. Yes!
    Share your story with courage!
    Love this word today.
    Blessings,
    Melanie

  10. Amen, Lisa! I know so many women who struggle in this area! I allowed shame to keep me shackled for most of my Christian walk, fearing the rejection of others more than receiving the acceptance of Him. I now put my story on display for His glory, allowing it to REFINE me rather than define me.

  11. Inviting God into our story is so powerful thank you! I do find that when I share my story with others they are not only encouraged but I tend to encourage my own heart again being reminded of God’s faithfulness. Thank you for sharing. Stopping by from Grace and Truth link up.

  12. Rewrite your story with compassion. YES!

  13. Oh, Lisa, I needed this. I’m living through a hard part of my story and your words spoke straight into my heart. Thank you!

  14. Beautiful post! Thank you for encouraging us to share our story. Everyone has a story worth telling. Thank you for linking up with Grace & Truth. You are a blessing to many.

  15. Yes and AMEN to every word of this, Lisa! Beautifully expressed. Loved the quote from Ann Voskamp too. Such truth! <3

  16. Loved this- “Shame and compassion cannot coexist “ Great word here today!

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